The Rape Culture in Nigeria and the Conspiracy of Victim Blaming

Why is it that we tend to blame victims of rape as somehow being at fault for “attracting” this horrible crime?

This attitude just gets me really, really pissed off!

You’d hear people you thought were educated and exposed ask stupid questions like,

“But what was she wearing?”

“The lady must have dressed skimpily.”

“What was she doing in his house?”

“Girls must stop allowing themselves to get raped.”

So a friend of mine who is a wife and breast-feeding mother, recently sent me a really looong voice note describing her recent horrible ordeal with a popular fitness coach, who invited her to a massage parlour to help alleviate the pains she was having after a strenuous workout.

The “massage parlour” turned out to be his apartment and things quickly turned nasty as he attempted to have his way with her.

Luckily, she fought him off. Then complained to the managers and members of the Fitness Club. And surprise, surprise most people (especially older women) blamed her!

They blamed her for going to his house, blamed her for seducing him, accused her of “wanting” it.

When she decided to report to the police instead, they accused her of wanting to “destroy” their fitness club. They were shielding the rapist like he was the one raped!!!

And someone even said that she should be grateful that “coach” even finds her attractive.

Sadly, she attempted suicide 2 days later.

Wait a moment! ✋🏼

How did we get here?

Why do we do this? Why do we exalt our oppressors and defend them? Why do we put up our leaders on pedestals and exalt them?

Granted we should give them their respect but also hold them responsible when they cross the line and abuse the power and trust bestowed on them.

A lot of abuse goes unreported in gyms, churches and schools around this country because most times the very people who you’d think would protect you end up being the ones who crucify you.

I dunno what to say again! We cant blame Buhari for this one though… No.. its on us. All of us!!

Just because a lady visits your house or even hotel room doesn’t mean she wants it.

Just because she wore a low cut dress, doesn’t imply she’s begging for it.

Stop justifying bad behaviour!!!

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are snarky, offensive, or off-topic.

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